Hi Davit,
Nice to hear from you. I think I feel some pressure from some relatives who are pressuring me to "get a job", when I have been working at a frenetic pace without a pause for 5 years since retiring early to care for my mom.
There's some irrational guilt I feel for having time now, and I need some Tlc, not someone else's assignment to more stressful behaviour(alzeheier's runs in her family too, so maybe there's some connection to the faulty lecture).
Of course everyone is entitled to their opinion. However, I can choose what to choose.
There seems to be some "need" to feel stressed, since it's been plaguing me for a lifetime, but now there's no gun at my head, no parent to care for...she's safe and has her "eternal reward".