Ever find yourself particularly sensitive to other people trying to control you? For example, I get anxious when people try to strong-arm me into going out somewhere with them. As an agoraphobic, I want to try to go out sometimes, and I do go out alone when it's my idea and I'm in the mood. However, if someone else wants me to go out somewhere with them I often don't want to. Sometimes I will go with them if I'm feeling particularly good that day and if we're going somewhere I want to go to. But if I have a headache or bad cramps or something like that, then I just don't want to go anywhere. This then leads to a one-sided argument with that person demanding an explanation and then writing off anything I saw as an "excuse" and then just staring at me waiting for I don't know what.
I've become sensitive to people trying to shame/guilt me into things, or telling me we're going somewhere instead of asking me. I've become so sensitive to the guilt trip thing that the first sign of it just disgusts me, and if there was any chance I was going to acquiesce it's gone for sure. I don't want to teach someone that shaming and guilting me gets results.
I also get sensitive to people trying to take control of my situation and fix me. They may mean well, but they see an infomercial for an anxiety program or read about the latest supplement and insist I try it. If I don't, or if I do and get no results, they get frustrated and think I just want to stay this way. More stress. And I'm so tired of being made to feel like I owe the whole world an explanation for myself.
I remember when I first read Reid Wilson's book there were several accounts of patients with controlling family members, and I'm wondering if this is common to people with anxiety disorders and/or agoraphobia. I know many of us have heightened sensitivity in common, but I wonder if control issues are another thing we share.
