i just keep doing the things that i love regardless. luckily, my friends would NEVER allow me to sit in my house for more than a few days before they would physically force me, kicking and crying, to leave. this happened last week, because i was so depressed and anxious i was planning my own death. then my friends came by and made me get up, picked out clothes for me, made me brush my teeth, and put me in their car and drove me to the river. one of them had to hold my hand in the car because i was panicking and shaking.
ultimately, panic attacks will not kill you. it's not like we have heart disease, for god's sake! but sometimes you need a little help. i have told my good friends what i need from them: they know that if they don't hear from me for a few days, that something is wrong, that i'm slipping into one of my "spells". they know what to do, because we've made a plan together. they do not let me refuse them. they force me out of it, and it always helps. before we talked about, i'd go through periods where i wouldn't leave my apartment for months! reach out to your friends or family. tell them what you need, and then be willing to accept help when they offer.
so what if you have a panic attack in public? so what? i can understand, because i have them... and i have to keep asking myself that same question, or i would never leave the apartment. lol. i mean, we won't die. we might embarrass ourselves (but what does that mean, anyway?). we might have to sit down and take a rest. we might start shaking and crying. who knows? but whatever happens, WE CAN DEAL. YOU ARE STRONG ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH YOUR ANXIETY!
anyway, peace, girl. good luck. tai
