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I'M SICK OF WORRYING AND GOING TO THE ER!

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1062

Well you described high tension moments, and when they happen that may bring on further drastic thoughts. You sound a little better now. The important thing is that having those thoughts bothered you and that you recognized that it wasn't ok. I'm sure things will improve as your tension reduces. It's always good to monitor our stress levels. All the best.

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 78

One more thing Ann. I am back on my medication and will be switching over to Zoloft. I just hope that all goes well with that. (Wish me luck) but anyway I have been doing better, the thoughts are still there but not as intense and they are not scaring me like they did last week. I'm now searching for a reason for thinking like that and why I would have ever thought something so horrible. I knew these thoughts were bad and not normal that's why I freaked out and when into Choate services and told someone about them. It's almost like when I obsess about my health and have to go get check in the er but only this was thoughts about hurting my children. I HATE THESE THOUGHTS AND I WISH I COULD GET THEM OUT OF MY HEAD. This is the worst thought I think I could have ever had I would rather have the thoughts about my health and be worried about that all the time instead of the thoughts of the kids:(

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 78

I'm really not to sure. After my children were born I had one thought of sticking my son in the dryer. That came in my mind and then back out. Then one time when I was giving the kids a shower I was worried that I would drown them. I really didn't worry too much about that either. So I have had these thoughts in the past but not as intense and they didn't worry me as much. But aside from that I really can't say much about why I worry about hurting them. The only thing I can think of is all the stress I have been under with my sister moving in and my bills going up the fact I just lost my job. Or a couple of days before I had these thoughts my sister and I got into a big fight and we had it out. (BIG TIME). I came off my medication and I was getting mad at just about everything like my house not always being clean (OCD) things not being were I want them bla bla bla. I would just about flip out for no reason. Then after my sister and I got into that fight and she called me a bad mother I think that's what set it off. I don't know that's why I'm talking about it and looking for a answer to why I am thinking these thoughts' Do you know what I mean Ann? I'm searching for an answer I don't like the thoughts and I feel like I'm delusional will just snap( I've made it this far and I know better not to hurt my children but when I was having these thoughts my monthly friend was also due so that might also have something to do with it. I don't know all I know is talking about it and getting it off my chest helps and having other people tell me your fine and it's okay and your not going to hurt your kids make me feel better. I talked to everyone about these thoughts I get them off my chest I get them out I express my self. It's my only way of healing my self I think. What do you think? Please help me Ann. I don't have insurance otherwise I would be seeing someone and getting help I'm buying my medication right now which is a big help and is the first step to getting better but I don't know if I'm going to get better if I don't have people to talk to and get things off my chest.

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1062

Melinda, just curious here. Do you recognize a trigger for these fearful thoughts?

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 364

Melinda, My sincere apologies. I wasn't trying to attack you, was only concerned if I had that symptom, what I would do. Since this is not uncommon in OCD, I really feel that such thoughts would be very scary to me too, especially since it would be about my children. I honestly hope you find someone who has this symptom, and has overcome it. Trish

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 78

Your a 100 percent correct. Noramally these thoughts would have come in and then out of my head. But because I havn't been taking my medication it stuck with me and woudln't go away. And it ended up worrying me to dealth until I was so worried abou them and went and talked to someone about it. I want is an anwer to why I have these thoughts and if I am going to be okay. I love my children very much sometimes I think I let them get away with to much because of my owen issues. (And feeling bad all the time). I don't put my foot down. I just want some support from you guys not support as in your out of your mind more along the lines of yes melinda your okay and we understand and we all have proubems and you;ll look back on this just like the rest of the stuff you worry about and you will know that it was all in your head and it's good that you worried other wise there would have been something to then worry about:( you guys understand what I am saying. Thank you ann you just made my night you know where im coming from and you've seen me on here enough to some what know me with out making me feel bad thanks ann:)

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1062

Incidentally, this type of thinking is not at all uncommon in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1062

I can understand that our panic members might be shocked by Melinda's problem. She has said that her sister lives with her and that DSS dropped the case because the children were not being neglected or abused. Melinda has talked about this before and wanted to know if anyone else has experienced this type of obsessive fear. This message was edited by am on 10-1-03 @ 10:58 AM

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 7

Melinda Ann- I can't tell you how concerned I am about the threat, be it real or unreal, posed to your children. From your post, it seems that even you are uncertain whether or not these thoughts will be acted upon. I am almost relieved that DSS is coming to investigate. You indicated that, "And I will be fine in the out come. Further more my children are fine and I will be just fine. I know my wellbeing comes first and it is." Actually, your kids come first. and if you can't guarantee that you will not harm them, they you are not doing either of you any good. I think you should be seeking professional help for these thoughts, and when you have them, call a family member to come stay with you. I wish you the best of luck, and pray that your children are safe. DJ This message was edited by am on 10-1-03 @ 7:17 PM

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 11

I am so glad I came across this site!!! It helps so much to know I am not alone, I have been to er twice also thought I was having heart attack. My Dr. put me on paxil but it had lots of side effects for me one being sharp pains in my head, then I went to prozac which I lost all appetite and was losing weight fast, so I stopped that and have an appt tommorrow with my Dr. Anyways I was beginning to think I was crazy always obsessing about something being wrong with me, when I am in a rational mind (I think ok that is it I will controll this from happening) but in my irrational mind well thats a different story. I am so thankful to have found you all thanks!!!

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I'M SICK OF WORRYING AND GOING TO THE ER!