Whew! - I am sooo damn frustrated (though I've calmed down a little)...
Went to the mall this evening to walk and to reward myself with a surprise (today is my 20 day smoke-free anniv!!)...
I wanted a new 'intimate' as my special reward today, and when I tried on new bras (hope that's not too personal:) I just got so damned frustrated. I have a tummy on me now, and I am just uncomfortable with where I am with gaining the weight I've gained in this short time. UGH... Not that long ago I lost a good amt of weight, and now I feel like I've gone backwards so I am very frustrated. It's time for me to get a handle on what I am eating, and it scares me a little, not sure why, it has to do with my Quit I think. Just gotta find the balance here, ya'll. I am not losing my Quit, and I also need to be gentle w/self here...
OK I went to the grocery store after, and I am going to eat healthier... So I am making this commitment to me that I am going to eat healthier, less fat... I think I had really given myself permission these 20 days to eat, and to have some comfort food when I wanted it... I'm a little afraid as the comfort food has been there for me since my Quit. I gotta find the balance here...
As I drove into my driveway from the store, I said to myself, 'self :) hold on tight now - time to do daily mall walking (which I used to do and for some reason stopped doing daily) and watch what I eat! Although I am afraid, I know I can do this!
My Quit I protect with everything in me - now I gotta watch the food and find the balance w/my Quit (my #1 commitment!) and shedding some of this extra weight.
Thanks for listening everybody, I really needed to vent.
Healer
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/5/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 20
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 732
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $48
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 8 [B]Seconds:[/B] 14
