Hi:
I was not using your program for a while, but I want to restart the program and get support again.
I had a very rough therapy session on Monday. I became angry about something and I
have never done that in session and I was not quite myself. My therapist left a message
because things didn't sit well with her either. However, I took her concern that it meant
that she is afraid she cannot work with me, as she is not experienced in what I need. She
wanted to contact my shrink and she asked if her clinical supervisor could attend our
sessions. I got very scared, and I took it the wrong way. I used so many cognitive distortions
on this topic that i did do a thought record. I was feeling so lonely and abandoned because I
thought me showing my emotions got me in trouble. I wrote it all out in a journal, and I really
want to discuss it with her the next time I see her.
However the problem is I had to go to the pain clinic for my regular 6 week lidocaine injections.
I told the nurse and doctor how I was really feeling and long story short, I needed crisis services
last night. I did manage to stay home and I am fine today but I have so much shame and guilt.
My shame and guilt is did the therapist mean she didn't like it how I acted in session, or that I
had a lot of pain and that bothered her. I cannot contact her until Tuesday or our next appointment
on October 19, 2009.
My question for you is, is it okay to ask professionals for help, even if they are not mental
health services. I know I had no right involving the pain clinic, but they do want to know how
I am physically and emotionally. I tried the crisis lines in my city but they were busy, and I was
still distraught and I even did not go to work. I missed a cpr/first aid class I enrolled in and
I cried to the secretary when I told her I can not make it. I need to hear from others
it is okay what I did, and that my shrink will not be mad, or my therapist. I think
I just need confirmation because I felt I was bad and sent to the principal's office.
...I would be interested in hearing your thoughts. Thank You
Windsybarbie