Okay I went shopping on a rainy afternoon with my kids. And my daughter had a melt-down in the middle of Walmart. Is there a better place? Food, Toys, Pretty princess clothes, and a frustrated maman. And the Red cross was collecting funds and gave my kids balloons on the way IN the store.
After the two warning about the ballons, the several follow maman, don't go too fast, and I will pop the balloons if they leave your hands again ... I had it! Then the tears started for Thumbalina - which I promised from the Easter Bunny (Easter Bells). And THe Tinkerbell coat and shoes were utterly forgotten in the basket!!!
Then there was the tears for McDonalds !!! what, it was 4:30 and papa started supper. I was getting shoes, a coat and juice. No McDonals not even a fry. And that started the you are the worst... you hate me and love Tigre only. You want to abandone me... I want to go to sleep and never wake up ... So two warning about being dragged like a baby later ... and I grabbed her arm and dragged her to the cash.
Then I got the crisis. you better apologise to me. You hurt my feelings and I will not move without an apology! Fine, as long as she did not run away in the crowd and as long as she did not try to bite me again! I could live with a lump in a line! By then I was sweating from the effort of pushing a cart with one hand and pulling 47 lbs of Tiamat without being bit. And not losing my son in the video games.... And the stress of people looking at me! I know MANY are parents who have gone through a melt-down and would be sympathetic but there is always one face in the corner of your eye that is a critic...
100$ later I dumped my lump into the cart grabed my bags and raced for the door! Away from the crowd i was able to beg plead and treathen like a normal parent
. And even get a coat on my Dragon of Chaos. And a grandmotherly type stopped to talk to Tiamat. She was still crying but ready to go for juice at the grocery store, and hot chocolate at MMMMuffins after (papa had trouble with his recipie in the mean time).
At the grocery store the run in the ailes did some good!!! Away from the stimulation and the crowds of Walmart. even my husband is cranky there!!! Our one trip a month is at 8:55am or we do not go. And I now remember why. it is stressful for us to keep track of what we need and what we want. What is our budget like. And deal with all these people all over -very claustrophobic. So for children, it is tough. Need and want are not distinct and they do not have a budget... So NO is a rejection. And only in that moment. (Because, later my daughter was fine and really happy. We bought a dollar store candy and wind-up toy and Tiamat told me she never wanted to lose me. She loves me more than anything. ) No matter what happens in that moment before the shelf, a negatif answer will cause a problem because there is a something broken...
Zellers at Xmas is the same problem and toys R us as well... it is the crowd's energy, the way the store is laid out, the colours and the lights, the lack of air, the lack of cashiers, and the junk at the cashes...
I brought this up because dealing with stress is about all the little things we do, the eating better, the exercise, the rest and sleep, the medications and doctors, that come together and