As much as the doctors think it is easy to turn off the negative problems and focus on the positive, they don't know it all.
In a 30 minute conversation, we talk about symptons, medication and touch on what you like and a few concerns and before you get into what else is wrong, the grab onto a simple statement and jump to the wrong conclusion.
At the first visit with him, I told him I try and spend time with my girl friend. GIRL Friend. My best friend is a girl ... get it. He jumps to the conclusion "oh, girlfriend ... your gay! That explains it." I had to correct him ... I call my best friend, my "girl" friend. Makes me wish I had never mention the fact that I have a friend that sticks with me with all my troubles.
I think my main problem is that I don't tell people what is bothering me. At home or at work. Work right now is hard for me because on person I can no longer work with is pushing me to get back to the regular me, who does anything that they are told and let everyone walk over them.
I shake constantly at work, have trouble breathing and I have only been back 3 weeks after a 7 week leave. I am so tired after work I fall asleep right after dinner and wake up 2-3 am. 2 hours before I am suppose to.
I can't really talk to my boss because he is getting ready for another major change at work, but sometimes I wish he would see the trouble I am in. Sometimes I have to go outside and freeze to calm down - go outside without the jacket, in minus degree weather and high winds,(Ontario has been having a rough winter), and freeze myself calm.
With the current medication, I feel like a walking zombie sometimes.
I will have to wait and see what happens.
Amanda