i feel like the homework for challenging negative thoughts (wks 4 and 5) is very crucial, and it's going to pave the way for how i think in the future. i'm going at my own pace and am always looking out for when i react negatively to something so i feel like i'm making progress.
however i've completely forgotten about my goals. i feel like i'm even further away from developing good habits because i spend so much energy thinking about how negative i am. i have no energy to even begin to think about how to make a step in the right direction. i think about the goals i set for myself in the beginning and i think they're stupid and i feel like if i give them up i will be happier.
i'm basically just venting here, but it would be nice to hear if anyone else has had a similar struggle with dissecting your thought process vs working toward a fulfilling life. i am doing everything i possibly can in my power, medication, psychotherapy, reading, homework and i find it so hard to congratulate myself even for that. those aren't even close to the goals i want to reach.
