Dear Becky, Thank you for that. Being oneself is normal. What a great point. In my opinion,that kind of self acceptance is key not only to feeling contentment but to growing and changing in positive ways. Another way to put it is "loving what is because that is all there is" makes perfect sense otherwise you are doing nothing but raining down frustration on yourself. There is no other alternate world where there is a different "normal" than we ae experiencing.I also think that right thinking does contribute to a lessening of one's depression. Of course some of us need medication before we can do any thinking at all. I think a mood disorder does overwhelm ones rational abilities at times...that is for sure.

happiness is the depression site...kinda ironic perhaps.

Hello for myself, happiness is occurs when I am not depressed. usually that occurs when i am totally absorbed with what i am doing. perhaps i am engaged in a good coversation with someone. perhaps i am making them laugh. i might be playing with a beautiful child, marvelling at his innocence and joy for life. or i might be forcused on taking a picture, searching for texture or composition. i might be sitting in the stands at a high school basketball game getting emotional as the score see-saws back and forth. i don't believe happiness will come to me. i have to step out of my everyday stressfull routine. i have to change my behaviour. i have to seek out happiness. When i feel depressed that is not so easy...often happiness comes just before that moment when i fall asleep...when i realize the day is over and i can fade away into a peaceful oblivium for a few hours. bob

Something to remember, that is so hard to remember (believe me I know) when you are depressed is that happiness comes from within. For so long and still at this moment, I am struggling with this concept. I know that it is true, its a matter of feeling it. I was relying on other people to try and make me happy, to make me feel appreciated, to make me feel normal, to make me feel ok. And yes, we do need other people...life would be hard, lonely, and boring if it weren't for other people. Other people can make us laugh, take our mind off of our troubles. However, if you are not happy with yourself, if you do not appreciate yourself and your life, if you don't realize that "normal" is a very subjective term, if you don't realize that you are ok.......then you will never be truly happy. You won't be able to stand in the face of criticism and weigh it as helpful or meaningless. You won't be able to smile when you are alone. What I am working on right now that I am realizing is the whole normal thing. For so long, I just wanted to be "normal"...just wanted to be someone else, have some else's brain for a day. But then I realized, hey who said they are normal, what is normal. I realized I needed to quit trying to be normal and just be myself and that for me IS normal. If that makes any sense.....I know this idea and concept is almost impossible to feel or believe when you are depressed and this is why I think I am slowly coming out of this dark cloud, at least for the moment. Or maybe, its the other way around, maybe because I am allowing myself to have these thoughts, the depression is lifting. Who knows...maybe our thoughts really do affect our mood and the more positivity we put into it, the positivity we get out of it. All I know is that right at this moment, I am not gleefully happy....there really is no reason to be, but I'm also not stuck in the deep abyss of depression. I am allowing myself to do what I feel, and this is making me happy or well maybe happy isn't the right word, but content. Isn't that what we should strive for.....to be content, happiness comes once you are content for yourself. Small steps at a time. You cannot jump from depressed to happy, if someone can then I don't think they were really depressed. From depressed, you

where to? any idea? or will it come looking for me one day instead of me searching in vain?