Scott,I was just wondering how you are doing?

Scott, Thank you for sharing your story. The first step is to admit you have a problem. Good for you! You will find that a counsellor, therapist or doctor can be very helpful. Take The depression Test to your doctor. This will help better assess the situation and perhaps help with medication dosages. Please feel free to browse the site and most importantly our online support group. These indviduals are an amazing group who have much knowledge and advice to give. There are many people here that are going what you are going through. We are here for you, at any time. Keep strong and take it one day at a time. Hope this helps, Josie ___________________________________ The Depression Center Support Team.

I think you are far from being alone here and my thoughts are with you but it sounds like perhaps your on the right track in that you express that you do want to help yourself and you have signed on to help - although it is four days away. I do recomend support group meetings such as CODA - codependents anonomous - if you need something supplemental or in addition to - and if you search the web - they typically llist contacts and meeting times and places. Not fully understanding your situation here - I do feel for you and wish you the best of luck.

I have finally lost it and feel like I've hit bottom. I was first diagnosed as having depression when I was sixteen. My father and I did not get along, he had a stroke which made him very determined to control everything including me. He took me to five doctors before one agreed to put me on medicine, prozac. I never really took it because I viewed my sad feelings as being derived from our relationship. I left home soon after and moved in with sister. Soon I was finding myself doing any and every drug I could get my hands on until my girlfriend literally punched some sense into me if I didn't stop I was going to die. We fell into a very bad co-dependent love addiction that lasted eight years. I followed her all around the country while she was in school because the only times I/we felt happy was when we were together. Whenever we'd break up I fall into deep depression and even tried suicide. I finally decided I had to go to school. Being w/o her made me miserable and she eventually moved in with me, however I was going to class during the day and bartending six nights a week. I had become an alcoholic because I hated being alone at night. I would choose to stay out all night and morning instead of coming home to her. Then in the morning I'd be too depressed to get up and go to class and just laid in bed all day. This went on for almost two years in which I developed a significant gambling problem because it was the only thing that made me happy, the booze just made me numb. Long story short we bought a house she got fed up and kicked me out. I even tried to purpose which being rejected by the one person I cared about destroyed me, that was over a year now. I have fallen into a deep depression that has drove me to drink just to forget. But it became harder and harder and I'd find myself drinking for entire days at a time and then being bed ridden for at least another day feeling guilt. Scared to answer the phone, scared to leave the house. I briefly dated a few other women lately, but they are alcoholics and have similar issues and after the fun of drinking away reality we'd fight and it would end. I'm not in a place where I feel I can be in a relationship anyway, I still want what I had. I've just about have got myself kicked out of scho