Actually Roland, it is very common that marriage problems start after the depression. Usually one of the partners has been depressed and has, because of that, hold back on the partnership. A depressed person is so busy with him or herself, that there is very little room for any one else. A partner that is loving understands that and will be supportive. However, somewhere down the line, they will start feeling lonely and abandoned. But since the partner is the one with the illness, they often put their own needs and wants aside (we were thaught as children that it was not right to ask anything from a sick person). Than the partner comes out of the depression. His or her life is going okay again, then a lot of repressed anger from the usually supportive spouse comes out. They feel the have given sooo much and have gotten soooo little in return, now it is your turn to take care of them. I have been there with me being the depressed one and there is hope. We made it through and are still together. I think it is a good idea to talk to a psychologist about your depression and maybe seek counseling together. A lot of issues need to be talked about before a marriage can go on after such a traumatic, longlasting event for both partners. I went into individual therapy to find my own odds and ends and I did. My therapist focused on my feelings i.c. to some therapist that focus on behavior. Than my husband and I worked together. Truth is, our life is better now. Good luck!
