Hi Julie: My nameis julie too, after reading your messege I feel I must respond, the most important think I can say to you is this NEVER FORGET TO TAKE YOUR MEDICATION. I say that because my father in law is very depressed and has been in and out of hospital, he stops taking his medication, and ends up in the hospital, because he starts to think he does'nt need it, hears voices has conversation with people that are not there, and his family is all effected by this, so all I can say is take the medication NEVER STOP. Go to the center near you and seek out paitant help, go everyday if you must talk and see the Dr's when you can. As far as a job, I dont think you are ready to work yet, Do volenteer work to keep around people and seek more ECT treatment on a out paitant stand point. julie

hi julie, my name is diana and i am new as well. i just thought i would say hello and let you know there is someone else out there reading your posts, not only just the support specialists (not to say that they are not enough, i just thought it might be comforting to have someone else as well). anyways Hello. ~Diana

Hi Susanne, Thanks for responding. Actually I have a family physician, a psychiatrist and a therapist. All are willing to see me until I find new ones that will accept medicaid, but I'm not really sure where to begin that search. The letter should be in the mail any day now. My psychiatrist is aware of everything except the new bout of mania because it really just started yesterday and I've been trying to determine if the Trilepital, Zolft and Respridral (sp?) will keep it in check. Thanks for the advice.

Hello Julie (Willow), On behalf of the depression center welcome to the site. Sorry to hear that hings are difficult for you right now and there are many people here who have felt the same way, and are really willing to help you out. Are you under care of your family physician or health care provider? It is important to tell them about the 'new' feelings you have been having lately. As you can see from reading the posts there are many people here who are struggling and beating depression, so keep posting and let us know how you are doing. Susanne

Hello. I am new to the boards. I just want to say though many of these posts are quite similar to some aspects of my own story I think it’s important to share the better parts of our lives with one another as well. So for the first part of my post I’d like to share the positive aspects of my life before going into any details about the negative. I find this is more beneficial to myself so as I reread what I write I have good points I’m reflecting on those too. I am 31 years old and I have been married for 9 years. I have two handsome boys, ages 13 and 6. My husband is truly a wonderful man with a high degree of patience, supportiveness and lovingness (often times more than I am willing to give him credit for). He has a very supportive family with a tremendous amount of faith in what can only be construed by me as the impossible as I rapid, rapid cycle. I have one other person who I am extremely close to and that’s my sister. She has Bipolar as well so we share a lot between the two of us, but she lives about 10 hours away from me. I was diagnosed with Bipolar, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Anxiety last October, however I’ve been treated for depression on and off for the last three years. Having really looked at the facts of my life I can honestly say that I have had two out of three of these all my life and didn’t realize what I was feelings was NOT normal. I take three different medications now that seem to be working pretty well as long as I remember to take them, but I still don’t get as much sleep as I’d like. I’ve taken a couple of other medications prior to these and I also tried Electro Convulsive Shock Treatments (ECT) a few weeks ago. It’s odd I never thought my depression was that serious. I’d had homicidal thoughts and grandiose thoughts of being immortal or like I could accomplish anything and everything before and then felt extremely guilty and silly afterwards, but it became very clear when I started having serious suicidal thoughts and couldn’t make them go away that this is much bigger than I can handle on my own. I have borderline delusional thoughts with conversations inside my head with a religious tone and I struggle to determine if I am good or evil as I read the bible and misconstrue pretty much everything tha