A lot of the road back to recovery is straight forward and logical but there are bits that will seem wrong like accepting panic rather than fight it. Fighting it gives it focus and importance. Accepting allows it to become part of the past where it has no importance other than that it happened. Fighting it makes it a possibility for the future. Which it is, but more so with the focus on it.
Coping skills and positive thought are the most important, everything else only makes these more possible.
There is a mistaken thought about being cured. It does not neutralize Caffeine. It allows you to tolerate it. I can drink coke or coffee but still get the anxiety except it isn't really anxiety anymore still if I had a coffee late at night it would keep me awake. That is a chemical reaction. Like last night, chocolate was bothering me. I like chocolate a little too much. So I was restless and today I'm paying for it. But I can get away with it because it won't make me panic just make me feel hung over. Busy will help. Funny thing is though once cured the craving for caffeine isn't as strong.
There probably would have been less panic if you just accepted it as something that happens instead of adding guilty feelings. It isn't your fault even though it is you.
Today I feel robbed. I feel like my anxiety/worry/panic is robbing me of so many precious things.
Last night, Hubby wanted to watch one of our favourite shows together. Well guess what, I had a panic attack. Ruined the evening. I still ended up watching the show but it wasn't the same, it wasn't as fun. And right after the show, I went up in a panic and got into bed to just drift away.
I don't want to be robbed anymore.
I want to be able to be tired without it causing me to have a panic attack. I want to be able to stay up late if I feel like it without panicking. Heck, I want to drink the odd cup of coffee here and there. I want to be able to drink chocolate milk or coca cola. I want to be able to eat chocolate! I want to be able to just go about my day without having to think about how I am gonna get through my day.
Anyway, this turned out to be more of a rant then I had expected.
