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Anxious Thought - Nobody Likes Me

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Anxious Thought - Nobody Likes Me

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1

Hey! I'm living in a foreign country too and I'm sure that has a lot (if not everything) to do with the way I'm feeling!!! I'm in Taiwan. Where are you?

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 274

Is it really true ink? I really needed to hear that this evening, as I was feeling down. I was feeling friendless. Sometimes, after our church meeting, everyone goes out together for dinner, or to have some fun, at each others homes, etc., however, often we are left out , we are living in a foreign country and they do not want to speak English to us. Also, there are other problems, however, sometimes when we ask others to join us for association they just say NO, with no explanation. So I have become afraid of asking others to spend time with us. Tonight we were left on our own, so I felt sad. I felt like, "nobody likes me". So I was happy to see you filling in for chimpmaster and reminding me that MY HAPPINESS COMES FROM WITHIN ME, NOT FROM OTHER PEOPLE. But now I am starting to question this whole idea, because, I have just read a book from Patch Adams who said that happiness comes from helping others. I have experienced that happiness too, however, I have not had much success helping others lately. SOOO, I wonder if this is also true, "There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving"? My friend said, "but first you have to have that happiness inside before you can give to others...." So, how can my happiness come from within me, and not other people? I want to believe it but it's hard. We all need other people. All the smartest geniuses in the world have said that the most important thing in their lives was the love of their family and friends....all the other intelligence and accolades of other people for their accomplishments in science etc., were really nothing in comparison. SO...MY HAPPINESS COMES FROM WITHIN ME....thank you for your vote of confidence! I just need to come to really believe it and make it come true! Love,

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 5

Your inner happiness comes from you and not other people

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 274

MY INNER HAPPINESS DEPENDS ON ME, NOT ON OTHER PEOPLE (Don't let the turkeys get you down...) :p

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 117

hehe cool. Nah Im doing really well thanks. I have some intrusive thoughts which I dont like much, but Ive got it all under control at the moment. Ill post some stuff in the success stories forum soon. I think I am ready to share it now. I try to practice what I preach, or more to the point I am preaching what I am practicing, so all this therapy seems to be paying off for me. For the first time in my life I am really putting my own feelings first and its helping me a lot. Anyway, just a reminder Your inner happiness comes from you and not other people :)

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 274

MY INNER HAPPINESS COMES FROM ME AND NOBODY ELSE! Thanks Mr. Chips....keep it coming on...Is there any affirmation I can help you with too? I also asked some other friends and my husband to tell me the same thing every time they see me, so I'll see if it will finally rub off or sink in or whatever.... :)

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 117

Your inner happiness comes from you and not other people :)

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 274

Thank you chimpmaster; I think I will try the last suggestion first. On a logical level, I know that it is a silly belief because people have shown they like me. But the crazy part is the intrusive thought is that all those signs of affection are fake, or two faced. The culture I am living in tends to be that way (two faced I mean). That is what leads me to the intrusive negative thoughts. I think, "My inner happiness comes from me not other people." is also true. I know other people who are worse off than I am but still love themselves a great deal, and are happy most of the time. So it shouldn't really matter what other people think of me, as long as I like me. (I hope I like me???). "a short, punchy mantra" sounds good; so I will try this: "My inner happiness comes me and not other people." I will try to remember that! MY INNER HAPPINESS COMES FROM ME AND NOT OTHER PEOPLE! I wish you would remind me of this every day for a few weeks...could you?

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 117

Redface, there are two positive ways you can approach this thought. 1) Disregard it. Intrusive thoughts tend to slow down and even disappear if you ignore them. Not letting it bother you is the key. Thought stopping, or other distracting methods are the key here. 2) Answer it with. - Dont be silly, of course other people like me. - or even better. My inner happiness comes from me not other people. It doesnt really matter what other people think in the end, as long as I like me, thats what really matters. Usually if you choose (2) a short, punchy mantra that sums up one of those things can help a lot. Otherwise you can visualise something which helps you.

for 20 år siden 0 +0 / -0 274

How do you cope with it when you get the negative thought, "nobody likes me"? I know it is generalizing, however, I can't seem to get over this one. Any good suggestions?

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Anxious Thought - Nobody Likes Me