Hi Sunflower Painter,

 

Remember that being anxious when starting a new job is completely normal. How far are you along in the program? The skills you use in the program will help you with the anxiety. 

 

What do you want to gain from this experience tomorrow?

My daughter was home today sick. Again. Her throat is sore etc. I have no idea how other people do it, working full time and having a school aged child.

One thing I finally noticed about my anxiety level is that I can't have caffeine.

So, now I have to figure out tomorrow. I am super anxious.

Sunflower

Congratulations!  I'm happy that you're happy :)

Shari

After lots of thinking I realized that I need to work with children. I just like it too much to give it up. So, I applied for 2 jobs, and got 2 interviews. Both are working with children with special needs, which is my passion. I love it. Flower arranging is nice but I can't do it for a long term job so I turned the position down. It felt right.

I also changed my references so no one from my last job will be contacted. I think they may have been saying untrue things but I am not sure.

Sometimes my anxiety tells me important information. I find that certain situations cause me so much anxiety that I have to realize that they are wrong for me. I knew that I loved working with children with special needs but ignored my own desires. 

I think this is all part of the process of talking more positively to myself if that makes sense. Instead of just applying for random jobs I decided to pick from my strengths. Hopefully it works out :)

My next interview is next Tuesday. I also go and spend an hour or so at the place where I went today on Wednesday to see if I like it. Just for an hour or so which is nice so I can see if it is a good fit.

So for this weekend I plan on relaxing and enjoying myself. I haven't been doing that much lately. Halloween night was the worst. Since then I am doing some online help and reading more often. 

Take care everyone, and thanks for being there.

Sunflower

Ashley is right, it's normal to have the jitters when you are doing something new.  People without anxiety and panic get the jitters too, so it's okay.  I think that it's just a new experience and that's the only reason - not because you would rather work with children.  I think flowers are easier to work with than children - ha ha :) :) :)  It's okay that you have no idea what you want.  You will find out if this is what you want, by going and trying and being in the moment.  I have every confidence in you.  When I was in Florida and was looking for work, I was looking for part time, because I was anxious too.  I've been a housewife most of my life.  What I told myself was that there are 24 hours in a day, and working part time, in the grand scheme of things, it's very do-able.  You can get through even if you're sick or stressed.  It's just a temporary part of your day.  I think after two weeks (the adjustment period of a new schedule) you'll be comfortable and confident and may actually enjoy it :)  It's good to get out with people and talk and it's a happy job with flowers.  I know it's work and I'm not making light of it and I know I am not working part time now, so I probably shouldn't talk (although I have worked in the past) but I really believe you can do this, and as you see that you can do this and work through the uncomfortable feelings, your fear will lessen and lessen over time.  You will feel good about your accomplishments and have purpose and feel good working and being productive and helping your family.  Focus on the benefits and positives.  That's how I look it.  I don't know if it helps, but I just want to encourage you for tomorrow.  99% of what we worry about, never happens.  I think you're going to surprise yourself and have a great day :)  We're all here for you!  You can do it!  I just thought of something that may put things in better perspective.  Also, in Florida, when I was anxious about working, I met Sarah, who has Down's Syndrome and she was working at the grocery store and she was happy, confident and she can do it, so why couldn't I?  Also, there are many people with mental disabilities and physical handicaps that work.  I do realize that anxiety and panic can be disabling also, but there are so many people who have different kinds of challenges in life, and they can do it and we can too.  I'm saying this from a place of encouragement, not to make anyone feel guilty.  That's not my intention - I promise.  

Shari

Hi Sunflower Painter,

 

Remember, being anxious about a new job is completely normal and actually healthy. It means you want to do a good job and make the right choice.  Try not to focus on the anxiety, focus on what you want to learn from this expereince. What do you want to learn?

 

Once you are at your job just do your best and stay focused on the moment; that's all anyone can ask for. If you want you could read up on flower arranging on the internet as a refresher. You could also write out a few questions you may want to ask during your training. 

 

What are you looking forward to about this job?

 

 

Sheesh. I am a mess :)

Sunflower

Great support and shared experience!

 

Sunflower, take what you need and keep it close.

 

Congratulations on your new job!

 

You will be brilliant!

 

 

I feel the same way you do.  I am a planner and I like to know, without trying too.  I tried Florida and it didn't work for me, but I feel good about it, because now I will no longer wonder if I missed out on something for the rest of my life.  And, there are a lot of positives in Maryland that I didn't realize until I was somewhere else.  Good perspective.  When my daughter and I had dinner Friday night, I asked her a question.  I was trying to figure out where I want to retire in 15 years (talk about planning ahead!).  She had the perfect answer, she said, "You won't know how you feel until you get there 15 years from now."  It's so true.  I could easily pick a place now, but 15 years from now, I'll be in a totally different mindset.  I know, when the time comes, I will know what to do, because I will have peace about it or not.  And, some doors will open and some will not.  I guess that's the surprise of life, you don't have all of the answers, but it's fun finding out.  Any good possibility can happen.  Thanks for asking how I'm doing lately :)  I'm doing great.  I have peace and I'm happily blooming where I'm planted and I'm making something beautiful out of my life :)  I'm also looking at all of the positive qualities in my spouse and dismissing anything negative.  I've decided to do that with everyone.  Just notice the good things and ignore the bad things.  It makes life much better.  I've always thought that being a floral designer would be fantastic.  It would be fun to take a floral arranging class.  How are you doing?

Shari

I just sometimes I would know what I want without trying it. That sounds silly in a way though since how would I know if I like something without doing it lol.

I am so indecisive. It's funny though, I could easily help other people figure out what they should do but when it comes to me, I can't seem to figure me out!

Oh well, I will try to look a this as an adventure :)

Thanks

Sunflower

PS- how are you doing lately?