Glad to see that you are back on board with us! This will be a challenging journey but I know you can do it. Are you doing the program, the readings and activities? They will help prepare you for what is ahead and how to deal with it. What you said about your Dad is very powerful. Draw upon that strength when you need to.
Here are some ideas for you, moving forward:
- Remind yourself that your urge to smoke will not last forever. It will pass in a few minutes if you just wait it out. To be safe, look at your watch and check in with your craving level in 15 minutes.
- Change your routine. Control your surroundings. Dont put yourself in places where people smoke, or places where you used to go to light up.
- Get support from people you trust. Tell them that you are having a tough time and ask for their help and patience. Be specific in letting them know how they can help.
Wow, this is amazing~! Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. Each reply is excellent; food for thought in many arenas/emotions. Making it through the morning drive without even one puff today was the hardest; that's always the worst time of day for my cravings and is the smoke (and coffee) I look most forward to everyday. Felt so good to get past that 1 today! Also, resetting my Freedometer in anticipation of a clean NOPE quit from here on in felt good. It was so weird to log on here the past few days, knowing I'd only had one or two little puffs and yet feel so GUILTY I thought I was such a loser and undoubtedly alone in this 'sneak' behavior. It's hard to believe that I have become such a slave to nicotine that I was willing to twist or deny the facts just to keep defending my smokes! Eye opening and not flattering! My lungs feel crispy today and are rattling; coughing too and basically feel spaced out and like crap. Baggy eyes & look worse than I feel. Sigh! But funny -am a bit proud of my true 'cold turkey quit' so far today. NOPE from now on! I feel like I have missed meeting someone incredible with your good friend MM - am so sorry to hear of her passing so young. May her quitting spirit live on here!
AMEN!!! You have told my story in the short form. Only difference is I never hated this site, because of this site I have kept trying and trying and trying. The support here is amazing, beyond words. I have many friends here that have quit when I did and they have long term quits . You see I thought I could only have a puff, then maybe a one cigarette no one needs to know. Funny, I knew and it ate my lunch. I would come here confess and received love and support. I am sorry to hear about your father, but smoking will never make things better, never. Been there done that so many times. At one time my plate was so full that even my doctor said she understood why I continued to smoke, but when I was ready so was she. The one thing I have learned over the years, yes years, life happens whether you are smoking or not. It is easier not to. So I am with the others N.O.P.E. We just lost a beloved member here because of smoking, a great lost to all of us. So hang here, come and vent your little heart out and we will give you virtual hugs.
Hi Eya, yes you are right, no one who has been successful at quitting, is able to have a 'puff' here and there. Its the one puff that leads to 2 to 10 to 100 an back to smoking. The reason that one puff here and there doesn't work is because nicotine is a nasty drug, worse than heroine, which is why it begs you to come back for more. It is, very much an addiction and you are the addict. I am glad you are seeing this and I am glad you came back right away smoke free. There is a lot of great information in these threads, read more, read all you can, it really helps.
I had to set my quit meter over again today. Too many days in a row with 'slips' - and I only quit 4 days ago. I was fine ignoring my little occasional puffs - telling myself I was 'basically' smoke free. But I couldn't sleep for 2 nights in a row; couldn't get any work done and couldn't get logged off this stupid site! Posting an 'I'm smoke free today lie' in my diary just wasn't working for me. Guilty conscience! Sneaking a little puff here & again ruins the diary. And all this heartfelt support, with long time members, educators and friends alike cheering on all you people (who are doing well with your quits) just ticked me off! I hate that it's required to post your age in the personal profile - I hate thinking about how long I've smoked and at what cost. It feels like an invasion of a lady's privacy and makes me feel like a research 'stat'. I read a ton of threads from beginning to end over the past few days and couldn't find a single member with a successful long term quit who was able to have the occasional puff! All successes are a great big N.O.P.E. So I thought I'd kick this site like a bad habit and go back to my closet smoking in peace and not have to post my failure to quit smoking all over the internet for the world to see. But couldn't seem to do that - so am back today; and so far am absolutely 'smoke free'. Feels good. I lost my Dad to cancer a few weeks ago - I really love my Dad! But he wouldn't be proud of me using my grief on his behalf as an excuse to smoke. I know today that I have to do this quit on my own. It's hard when my family smokes around me - but that's their journey. I also realize today that this site is not the culprit or something to Hate; it's the nicotine. So today I'm grateful to have found theses words of wisdom at a time when I really needed a wake up call. So will continue to read voraciously, This is a good platform for those who truly wish to face their addiction head on and maintain their quit. Am coming out of the closet for good.