Hi all :) I'm doing gr8 today and yes I am extremely proud of myself, infact my self-worth went up the scale b/c I was able to just slip and not fall. I have met very few people that it didn't take practice to quit smoking. We all are going to have our own way that we see our life & that is based on our personal experiences, enough said. When I quit drinking 11 yrs. & 3 mos. ago I didn't relapse once & I must say I was self rightious and didn't understand why everyone couldn't quit and stay quit the 1st time. Well with smoking I now understand how last night actually helped me to want this quit more that I did a month ago. Those last 5 cig's gave me the desire to quit more than I've wanted to since I quit this time. Infact when I quit on 7/7/07 I didn't feel motivated nor think I would make it as far as I have. Those 6 cig's I smoked don't seem so bad when I realize that I didn't smoke 560. I won't beat myself up, b/c I know that will not help me quit.
During my last quit of a yr & 4 mos. I had one and relapsed.
This time I've had 2 little slips early on, which in my heart I know has strenghend my desire to quit. I'm now motivated and happy about quitting. All we can do is our best in anything we personally strive for in this life and I know that with quitting smoking I can honestly say that I have been doing my best :) It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. I do appreciate all the love & support from everyone no matter how it's done or how I choose to perceive it :) The bottom line is all of us in here want everyone to be successful. Never get too confident or believe that you've got this addiction licked b/c everything in life is temporary and we can only do our best one day at a time. I am so amazed that I didn't need to smoke that whole pack or totally relapse. It only took those 5 to feel like total crap and give me back my desire to be smoke-free like I knew life to be a yr ago when I'd made it past the hard times and could go hours without even thinking of cig's much less wanting one. It wasn't that long ago and I'm looking forward to that life again. This is my quit, no one elses. And yes, today I am very proud of myself.
I think there are very few of us in here that quit one time and never slipped or relapsed at all. But for those of u that are on your 1st and only quit so far and doing well, that's awesome!
I'm finding balance in my life today and it feels good to not be beating myself up like I always have in my past. Maybe that was one of the reasons I relapsed last time? Who knows? I even think that we should not be so judgemental to ourselves. Most of us addicts have been emotionally beat up enough in our past, so if we don't have anyone else to beat us up we do it ourselves b/c of that comfortable feeling. Yes smoking like drinking, cocaine, heroine, sex, food, shopping, speeding, t.v or anything else in excess, is all about INSTANT GRATIFICATION", and is harmful to us.
I'm tired, lol, it was a soul searching and spritual night for me. I've only had 1 hr of sleep and I'm going to bed.
Life is about progress not perfection and even though a slip appears harmful and could make someone totally relapse, that wasn't my experience, this time :) I don't know what the future holds for me but for this moment I'm excited about quitting and now I really want it :)
Ms. Lady, u left out praying :) I know you've done a lot of praying b/c during my last quit we prayed together. I know when we get afraid, angry disapointed etc. it's all about fear, b/c we want the best for our friends.
I believe all of us are different and all we can do is our personal best in this life. Good night, lol :) Plz be happy for me & don't judge me or think you could have done something or said something b/c that's not the case. It's all said and done. Everything always works itself out :) Even though sometimes feelings can feel unbearable and in our darkest moments we lose our faith, things still work themselves out :) We are not in control of other people, places or things.
Oh and yep I need to get back to my AA meetings as well b/c that will help with this quit as well.
Just breathe.........
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/9/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 28
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 560
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $134.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 23
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Quit Meter
$27,918.00
Amount Saved
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Quit Meter
Days: 610
Hours: 20
Minutes: 44
Seconds: 28
Life Gained
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Quit Meter
4653
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
93,060
Cigarettes Not Smoked
