tryagain: I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling. Like the others who posted before me, it's tough to know exactly what to say that may help someone in your position. All I can do is draw on my own experience. I'm 55, smoked for 35 years, more than 2 packs a day (I was a serious smoker). I tried so many times to quit and as someone here said, they were half-hearted quits at best. Here's the difference between those and this FINAL quit: Self talk. It almost sounds cliche, I know, but if you allow yourself to drown in a sea of smoking thoughts, smoking desires, smoking deprivation, you will almost certainly talk yourself back into smoking. When I would have terrible craves or overwhelming smoking thoughts and desires, I would get angry. The fact that I was suffering through such craves only highlighted the fact that I'm seriously addicted. Those craves actually served to help me stay quit (I know that sounds odd, but it's true.). I'm still angry at the addiction and I'm bound and determined to take back that control once and for all. Now, approaching 200 days, I still have bad moments and smoking thoughts, but it's much easier to say, "well, that's a ridiculous thought -- I don't smoke!" And then just move on to something else. I hope this helps in even the slightest way. I want you to stay strong and show yourself how much in control YOU are, not the nicotine! Keep the faith -- and your quit [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 10/8/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 199 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,982 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1592 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 26 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 20 [B]Seconds:[/B] 48

try, You have received lots of great support and advice, take what you need and keep it close. We thank you for sharing and know that your feelings have helped others see that they are not alone. We are always here for you :) Josie _____________________ The SSC Support Team.

I'm afraid you're gonna beat yourself up. You exhibit such strength of character. It comes from your depths. You have proven that you have what it takes. So why this onslaught? If you could only just get out the box. What is keeping you in this trap? Are you able to get a handle on that? I would venture to consider that something inside you is struggling with the surrender of cigarettes. Are you reaching out to them in search of something? or clinging to them in fear of loosing something? Certainly, many times to cave appears to be the path of least resistance, though in our brains we know that it only elongates the fight. Perhaps as your mind and body are transitoning to a non smoker, a part of you is realizing this and clinging on for dear life. Can that part be re-channeled in some way? What are you trying to tell yourself. These are just some of the questions that I, myself have entertained at times. You may not find them applicable to you and in that case feel free to disregard them. However, you may find they shed some light. Either way, know that as you say, we are here with you. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/29/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 117 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,175 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $585 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 11 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 44 [B]Seconds:[/B] 47

tryagain, How long have you been quit. If I remember.... you were quit..and then sliped and are trying again. How long did you make it the last time? How far along this time? Try.... I say this in the most loving way.. :) You have to learn a technique that you aren't using. I am not sure how to teach it to you. I am sure others here can help. I can only explain me. Here it goes...and so hope it helps. I have quit lots and lots of times. I am being honest when I say....I really don't know how many. I have tried to quit since I was in my 20's...and I am now 53!!!!!! YIKES!!!1 This is the furthest I have gotten. To be honest.... my attempts were half hearted for most of those years. Good intentions..but ignorant as to how to quit. Then the past 4 years I got more serious. I did lots of research. Still...everytime I quit I put into practice something I learned from the previous quit. My big revelation from my last quit was this: MAKE LIGHT OF IT....AS LIGHT AS YOU ARE POSSIBLE ABLE. That is not to say you will not have some hard craves...but they are much fewer and less intense. You have to learn the power of the mind. If you spend time thinking and missing how...when...and where you "use" to smoke than you are telling the brain to send out the signals. If the brain is on other things of life....it is to pre-occupied to pay attention to some of the physical craves. For example: Did you ever get real involved in a project. I mean an intense project and before you knew it ...it was past dinner time and you realized you hadn't eaten all day? Sure..as the day was going along little pop-up messages came up saying.."you really should grab a bite to eat"......but you kept working at your project and the thought was gone almost instantly. That is why commercials are so effective. You were thinking about other things ....UNTIL...UNTIL..... a commercial popped up with a thick juicy pizza. Now that thought is in the forefront of the brain dwelling on the senses to pick up the phone and order the pizza. The more you invision that pizza the more you crave it. NOW.... the movie you were watching comes back on and you get re-engrossed in the movie...and out the window goes the "gotta have the pizza". That is... till they repeat the next co

Oh TryAgain - I am so sorry that you are struggling and having such a tough time. This is so very hard and I know what you are going through. Unfortunately, I don't have any advice or words of wisdom. Unfortunately, I'm finding this experience very exhausting as well. The one thing that is allowing me to hold on is the insight that what I want is impossible. I want to smoke and feel better, but I don't want the addictive part (constantly craving, constantly planning my activities around smoking, waking up in withdrawal, smelling all of the time, being controlled by nicotine, etc). I want to be able to be a "social smoker" like a few rare people that I know - the people that can smoke a bunch one day and then not again for a few weeks, etc. I hate them!!! Anyway, I know that I want something that is not an option/not possible. So, Tryagain, why don't you & I make a deal. Let's get through today and see what tomorrow brings - maybe we'll see that light (the one at the end of the tunnel) tomorrow - wouldn't that be amazing?! If it's still not there tomorrow, then well decide what to do then. So until tomorrow - let's get through this together! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/24/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 60 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,115 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $390 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 2 [B]Seconds:[/B] 58

When it gets too bad, I come here and there are others going through the same thing and it helps pull me through. Since 60 days, I had one day where I didn't think about smoking at all. Other than that it has been one non-stop crave. Without a single let up. I can't even sleep and get away from it. I dream of smoking. I go to sleep just to get some relief. I wake up with it. It is just always there. I used to have moments now and then when smoking didn't cross my mind. Those days are gone. It has come back, and come back with a vengeance. Starting with my step down from 4mg of gum to 2 mg of gum. Which, I've noticed doesn't do much good. I now know why people can get to 100 days, then cave. I used to think how could you do that, get so far and then give up? Now I know. There isn't any difference between this and starting over totally. I've learned a lot here. I've learned that one is too many and 1,000 isn't enough. I've learned hanging in there for the sake of hanging in there. I've learned the truth of something my mother always told me. Most people give up, right before they see the light at the end of the tunnel. One more step, one more day might see me through. It isn't this day though. On this day, I wanted a cigarette before I opened my eyes in the morning. Just like I wanted a cigarette when I closed them last night. What makes it bearable is knowing there are others at this same stage, going through the same thing. There are still others who went through the same thing and have come out the other side successfully. That helps to keep me going. That, and the smell and expense of cigarettes, the foulness, the heart beat irregularities, the coughing. Then of course, is it really worse than this. Sometimes yes, and truly, sometimes no. Sometimes I'd do anything to rid myself of this constant, constant, constant, nagging craving. Which is stronger? I hope it's me.